A Letter to Incoming Freshmen

Yo!! Jay here. I have been saying “I’m going to write an article” about a lot of things for a very long time now. After reading my colleague Lance Price’s “College Ain’t Corporate America” I finally got the push I needed to let an article out; if only this first one, anyways. I have always considered myself to be an above-average writer, but I’ve never really enjoyed writing. Mostly because it’s usually only on subjects that we won’t ever need in our professional careers, but that’s another topic for another day.

As I sit in my bean bag in my living room, I sit here in silence reflecting on my life from the last couple years and how it has shaped me into who I am today. There has been a hell of a lot of highs, and a good amount of lows as well, but understanding where you need to go back to, to keep a good balance of yourself is utterly important, and something that I personally did not learn until my junior year of college. College is a LONG journey, but it is very enjoyable; that is, if you do it right. There are many things which I did not realize until later in my career, that helped me continue down a good path in college and stay on track to do the things that I needed to do for me to be successful. It helped me graduate with no student debt, a full-time job at a Fortune 100 company and, most importantly in my eyes, a legacy left behind at my beloved alma mater that will endure for many years to come (at least, I hope). But the point of this article is not about that, it’s about how you can shape your college career to look EXACTLY how you want it, enjoy it, and still accomplish every goal you had coming into college. Let me break down exactly what I mean:

1. JOIN A CLUB!

This is super cliché, I get it. And that’s okay, because everywhere you see this, you are being told the absolute truth. I have been in the workforce for over a year now as a full-time employee, and let me tell you how awful my work-life balance was the first couple months of my career. I often found myself working past 7PM almost every night, and it sucked. I quickly felt myself to burn out, and I wasn’t enjoying my work as I should have been. I have a really good job, in my opinion, but found myself dreading to get up and go do it every day. How does this relate to college? Your schoolwork is your job and should be your second-most important priority while in school (yes I said second, and I will tell you what your first priority should be later). Every college campus has hundreds of clubs you can join. If they don’t have a club you like or one you think they should have, create it! Be a pioneer for something great for your campus. I promise you, it will leave your life so much more fulfilled when you finally walk across that stage and get your degree on your commencement date. There are over 20,000 students at my alma mater, The University of Toledo, and we are all passionate about something. Whether it’s politics, sports, Greek Life, or the environment, we all have something about which we care deeply. Use your time and energy outside of doing classwork to focus on these things. Not only does it help you balance out your time between schoolwork and other things, but it allows you to branch out and meet other people. It can open doors to so many different things you would not even imagine. It is even how I got my job now. Trust me, it helps. It beats sitting in your room all day after classes and studying, to which I can attest. Be like Nike, just do it.

2. Find a (good) Mentor(s)

I think this might be one of the most underrated things you can do when you get to campus, and something that a lot of people don’t do. This can save you from so many troubles and pains throughout your college career, just by doing this.

How?

For starters, if you get a mentor who is an upperclassman, I can assure you that they have been through everything you are going to go through in your first two years of school. The professors, change of pace from high school, hard classes, late nights studying, etc. Let them guide you and help you out. Be a sponge and absorb the wealth of knowledge that these people have to offer. They will be of great help to you……. IF you let them. Often, we turn people away because of the thought of letting other people into our lives and letting them know what is going on. We often fear leaving ourselves vulnerable to other people with the thoughts of being hurt or embarrassed by what other people may think or say about you. And that is okay. That is human nature and nobody is going to blame you for that. HOWEVER, speaking from experience it is extremely healthy and refreshing to let out that anger and those bottled-up emotions about the trials and tribulations through which you are going. A good mentor can help you through these things with their ability to listen and give sound advice on what steps they think you should take next. Hell, half the time we just need to know someone is listening to us, and that is good enough. It works. College will be stressful, there are going to be times you want to quit, but surround yourself with people who care about you. That will be the only way to stay afloat in the hard times. The people I leaned on in school are still my friends to this day. Through the bad times and good, they had my back. And for those I considered mentors, they ALWAYS came through when it was time for me to talk and get me back on the track to getting where I wanted to be when I graduated.

3. Make friends, but choose wisely.

Ahhhh. This is another great topic. Have you ever heard the phrase “you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”? Jim Rohn said that. I go back and forth on this a lot, but I find it to be true.

Think about this: Who do YOU surround yourself with?

This happens at every school, so don’t be discouraged, there are going to be people you meet who are at college for the wrong reasons. They will figure it out eventually, but don’t let their mistakes become yours. If you hang out with the people who skip class, party five days a week and spend the majority of their days in the student union or the rec center, what do you think you are going to start doing? Let’s look at the flip side of that; what happens when you hang around people who are at the library a lot, early to all their classes and maybe stop into their professor’s office hours from time to time so they know your face? Don’t believe me? Think about your five closest friends right now. You got them? Now think about what you are all doing right now. Think about what path you are all going down right now. Are you happy with that? If the answer is yes, beautiful. Keep going until you all reach your goals. If the answer is no, that’s okay. The world isn’t going to end tonight (at least, I don’t think so). There is still time to make a change, and luckily YOU have the power to change ALL of that. To me, it is a beautiful sight and thought, knowing you always have the power to change the things that happen to you in your life. Use that to your advantage. Your past does not have to define your future, but you must know where you have been in order to get where you want to go. If you and your closest friends haven’t had a great track record, take it upon yourself to express something to the group. Be the change. Hold yourself first and foremost, and then them, accountable for the actions that you all take. My mother always used to tell me “every action has consequences” and boy was she right. But all consequences don’t have to be bad. Choose to do good and be rewarded for that. You deserve to have good things happen to you, and so do the people around you. Make it happen.

4. You are priority number one. Period.

Remember when I told you that schoolwork is priority number two? Priority number one in college is whoever is reading this article. And if you are confused what I mean by priority number one, let me dive deeper into the meaning of this and why you need to make sure you have this mindset going into college.

Working in outside sales, my boss often refers to all of us sales professionals as “The CEO of our work territories.” She always says “You have a quota and a goal to reach each year in the field. If you do it ethically and do not break any rules, it does not matter how you get there.”

Wow.

As I went through college, I always thought that my job after I graduate would just be me getting a lot of tasks and completing them day in and day out. But my boss made it very clear from day one that I have complete control over how I want to do my job. I decide when I take office days, when I work in the field, who I work with, how many sales calls I make a day, etc. That is a ton of freedom for a 23-year-old, fresh out of college young man. It is a lot. But honestly, I wish my success coach or advisor gave me that same advice. “You are the CEO of your college career. You make it look however you want. There is no time table on when things should be done. Do it your way.”

Think about what I just said in that above statement. Everyone puts this huge stigma “I go to college for four years, then I graduate and get a job for the rest of my life.” Eh. Sometimes. But maybe it takes you five years like it did me. That is okay. The goal is to get the degree, not judge how long it takes you to get it.

You don’t want to take 18 or 21 credits in your last year of school to graduate "on time"? Don’t. The school won’t run out of degrees to give you. Are those jobs hiring? They are going to still be hiring. People are retiring, getting promoted and leaving jobs every single day. Don’t fret on those little things. You will be okay.

Do you have a lot going on outside of school and have three classes today? Sit in bed and think, meditate or whatever it is you do to relax. Don’t go to those classes. It’s okay. You must take care of yourself first before trying to do the duties that others assign you. If you don’t care about your own well-being, how do you expect others to? Tell your professor the circumstances why you did not finish that paper or homework assignment. Some will understand. Some won’t. But you won’t fail a class over one assignment. Make it up the next time.

Somebody asked you for help on a project, or on planning the next event for one of your orgs and you aren’t mentally there? Tell them no. It’s a skill I am still learning to this day, but one you will need for the rest of your life. Colleges will get enrollees the next year. Jobs have hundreds of candidates for the same position you are working for. Clubs have a lot of members that would run for the position you have. At the end of the day though, there is only one you. And you are irreplaceable. Protect your energy, keep your balance and ALWAYS make sure that you are okay before embarking on journeys to help others. You are and should always consider yourself priority number one. It may seem a little selfish, but in the long run you will look back and be thankful that you did put yourself first. You deserve to be happy, and this is the easiest way to do it.

If you got to this point in reading, thanks for finishing my first article. It took a little longer than expected for me to write, but that’s okay. After all, I am the CEO of my writing career, right? Incoming freshmen, enjoy your college career as it is the best times of your life. Remember to keep your balance and take care of business, but have fun while doing it. Peace.